If you haven’t read part 1, go here: 7 Things All the Single Ladies Should Know (Part 1)
4. Marriage will not fix your problems.
Not in a long shot. Marriage will only prove to amplify the issues you are dealing with now. Imagine with me for a moment, you will have another human being living, eating & sleeping with you – at all times. When we are single, it is easy to hide our imperfections behind closed doors. But marriage will swing wide those doors and magnify every detail of your life.
If you are having difficulties keeping your thoughts pure now, guess what? You will have the same issue in marriage. Money problems? Lack of friends? Marriage won’t fix any of these things. But I know who can…
The best thing we could do for ourselves is to start right now and allow Jesus change us – not marriage. Be honest with yourself and God. What are some things that need to change in your life today? His grace is standing by ready to help you.
So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:16 NLT
5. Dating is not the answer.
We live in a culture where ‘dating around’ is simply the norm. If you don’t date, you get looked at as if there is a foreign object growing from your head (I speak from experience). But who said it is normal, and who said it is good for us?
“I’m just trying to find the right guy!”
Let me ask you a question… If God knows the plans He has for your life (Jeremiah 29:11), do you think He already knows who you should marry? Then why on earth do we think God needs our help in finding our spouse? Believe me, He knows when and where you need to meet your future husband.
“Dating is harmless fun!”
I disagree. You have heard the phrase, “It’s all fun until somebody gets hurt.” Dating always involves someone getting hurt. But that’s only the beginning…
Dating trains us for divorce. There is no coincidence that dating and the increase in divorces came on the scene around the same time. Dating is a relatively new custom which became common place in the 1920’s. Guess what else started to climb in number? Yep. Divorce.
The truth is, you do what you practice. When you train yourself to go in and out of relationships on a regular basis, guess what happens when you get married? You will have a habit to break, and it won’t be that easy. In the same way that you got tired of that boyfriend, when those feelings arrive with your husband, things are a little more complicated.
I encourage you to seek God on this. Ask Him if you should be dating or if He has a better way for you. I also encourage you to spend less time worrying about meeting your future spouse and more time praying for him.
6. Don’t you ever, ever, ever settle.
I cannot over express this. Please. Do. Not. Settle. Don’t let a mental age clock in your head tell you that time is running short and you have to make a choice soon. You are better off staying single then marrying the wrong person.
Keep on running this race, and always keep your focus on Jesus. You don’t have to slow down in order to find the right man. You want a man that will speed you up, not to slow you down.
Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
7. Make sure you fill the void with Jesus, not a man.
There will only ever be one man who can meet all your needs and never let you down. His name is Jesus. No other man was created to take His place. No other man can measure up, not even your future husband. Life and marriage will only be sub par (or worse) if we don’t put Him at the center of it all.
When you exalt Jesus to the upmost place in your life and relationships, Grace Himself will step in and go to work on your behalf. Instead of facing disappointments and let-downs, you can rely on Jesus to always exceed your every expectation. And in the process, bring your relationships to a whole new level.
7. Your future is bright!
God had something awesome in store for your life! Don’t spend time worrying about your future. Live in the now and make today the best it can be. Don’t like something about your life? Change it. Laugh more. Dream more. Give more. Love more. You are the only one who can live your life, the only one who can dream your dreams!
I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. Jeremiah 29:11 MSG
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